Is It Love?
by despairing.soul
Summary: Kaneki wouldn't ever suppose that one day he might be living with Uta under the same roof, let alone, be his lover... He isn't even sure what feelings Uta truly holds for him because the tattooed ghoul never speaks much about himself, not to mention, about how he feels... However, despite how peculiar their relationship might look, they seem to be pretty much content. Is it love..?


**Author's Note: Jeeez, recently I have had such a crush on Tokyo Ghoul... and this is the result ;D This fanfiction is dedicated to the couple which in my opinion doesn't receive enough love and attention. I am aware that UtaxKaneki isn't a very probable pairing but just couldn't help myself... I mean, they are my two favorite characters and it just sorta happened that I started seeing them as a couple xD This fic probably contains a huge OOCness by Uta's side (don't blame me, I only watched the anime yet I intend to read the manga too ;3) but seriously, who doesn't like fluff...?**

 **Anyway, to any of fans of this pairing, I hope you'll enjoy, the fics with these two being together are so raaare ;_;**

 **I do not own any of Tokyo Ghoul's characters, the cover photo ain't mine either. M for the intimate contact between two males at the end of the fic ;3**

* * *

When they first met, Kaneki wouldn't ever suppose that one day they might get so close to each other.

Uta was strange and somehow intimidating, always calm and quiet. He never spoke more than it was needed, the only thing that seemed to entertain him was his job as the best mask-maker in the whole Japan…

And he was _scary_.

It's not that this ghoul had ever done anything bad to Kaneki. Yet he was spreading the certain aura which never failed to make the boy feel a little uneasy and tensed up in his presence. The look of his black with red irises eyes was often causing his heart to stop for a fraction of second and then speed up ridiculously to the point when Kaneki feared that the tattooed ghoul might hear it.

After the incident with Yamori which changed Ken both physically and mentally, the half-ghoul knew that he couldn't ever come back to Anteiku, not being the same Kaneki everyone knew anymore. Joining the Aogiri wasn't the thing he wanted either and after a few first months of living under the One-Eyed King's orders, he decided to quit and leave.

Not having anywhere to go, he turned to the only person who, he knew, wouldn't ever judge him — Uta himself. It wasn't long until he realized what was the reason for his strange behavior around the tattooed ghoul… in which Uta helped him a little by letting him in without any questions when he had appeared in front of the door to the mask shop because it quickly became clear that Kaneki wasn't the only one who felt that way…

How had it happened?

He didn't know nor was able to explain. All he could tell was that on that night they had become lovers and as such they had been living for over four months now.

If Kaneki was asked about their typical day, he wouldn't be able to give only one answer. The reason for that was simple — it wasn't possible to specify what the daily routine was because there wasn't any. Every day was different mainly because of the character of Uta's profession. His working hours depended strictly on the number of his clients and their orders. Sometimes the whole group of ghouls would appear during one day but there were times when barely one or two would ask of Uta's services in the whole week. And so his working hours tended to change really intensively to the point when he would get less than twenty hours of sleep during one week and have a few days off during the other for sleeping off.

Kaneki was there to help, of course. After all, he owed the tattooed ghoul almost everything. But he was of no use if it came to mask-making. He was paying his debt by keeping the shop and apartment clean and not coming into Uta's way. He had his little corner in the shop where he could spend his time on reading the variety of books and that was making him perfectly content. Besides, the older ghoul seemed to enjoy the presence of Ken while he was working even though he had never said it out loud.

Kaneki was barely ever leaving the place because with his completely white hair he would be too recognizable for Doves and the confrontation with them might be dangerous for him as they were determined to eliminate him as fast as possible.

Not many people knew about his staying at Uta's home. Kaneki couldn't look into the eyes of his friends after all that had happened, how he'd accepted the ghoul in himself and after those few times he had committed cannibalism which had resulted in him developing a kakuja beside his kagune. Uta knew of course about it. As his lover he had found out the truth quickly but accepted him anyway for what Kaneki was eternally grateful.

He didn't know what the whole lover thing meant to him, though. Uta wouldn't speak much and so Ken wasn't even sure what the tattooed ghoul truly felt towards him.

Sure, they would share kisses sometime during the day, the same went for the bed at night which at first had felt awkward (at least for Kaneki) but as the time passed by, he had grown accustomed to it and now he truly enjoyed the feeling of Uta's arms around him and his comforting presence and scent lulling him to sleep.

At times they'd have sex… and despite Kaneki's anxiety about it, it'd appeared that he'd had nothing to be afraid of. Uta, surprisingly, was the type of a gentle lover who would always take care of making his partner feel good and reduce the pain or discomfort to minimum. Kaneki didn't know about his past experiences in this field and so he didn't know if that was just for him or the older ghoul would treat any of his lovers in such a nice way...

...

Despite the lack of routine there were three certain moments of the day Kaneki particularly enjoyed and which would stay almost unchangeable. The first one concerned the moment like now, when Uta had already finished his job and it was still early enough for the white-haired boy to stay in the shop and read.

The tattooed ghoul stood up from his chair by the desk and came to the front door, turning the key in the lock in a clear sign that he regarded his job as done for today. He then went straight to Kaneki who was sitting on the couch with his newest novel and lay down near him, placing his head on Kaneki's lap and half-lidding his eyes with a dull sigh.

"You've finished early today" Kaneki stated looking at his watch, "It's only half past six in the evening…"

"We haven't had many clients recently…" Uta muttered, stretching lazily on Kaneki's lap, "The newest book of Takatsuki?" He asked opening one eye and looking up into Ken's face.

"Yeah… I got it yesterday" the white-haired boy answered, not returning the gaze.

"You should have told me you were coming to pick it… I'd have found you an escort" the tattooed ghoul said reaching for a box with his usual snack — human eyeballs.

"It's not that I am not able to do something as simple as buying a book, Uta-san" Kaneki muttered with a roll of his eyes.

"The Doves are hunting you. The only safe place is here" the older reminded, offering the box to the boy, "Want some…?"

Kaneki didn't mind eating human flesh anymore so he took one into his fingers and slowly guarded the ball into his mouth but he froze having it clenched in between his teeth, seeing that Uta suddenly raised up and leaned closer to him so that there was very little personal space left. Kaneki flushed, backing slightly with a question in the eyes.

"You took the one I also wanted to eat…" Uta whispered grasping Kaneki's chin and bringing his face up, "Why not share it then…?" He closed the distance between them and bit off the second half of the eyeball, quickly chewing and swallowing. Kaneki ate his part, blushing harder with every second. He thought that Uta would back but the tattooed ghoul leaned even closer and joined their lips together again in a lazy kiss. The teen moaned, opening his mouth when the other sucked lightly on his bottom lip. Their tongues danced together until they had to part, in need for the air.

"What was that all of a sudden, Uta-san…?" He asked, panting lightly.

"Isn't it what lovers do?" Uta asked, trailing slowly his fingers down Kaneki's jawline. "Besides, you stole my eyeball" he smirked, playing with the white wisps.

"You are the one who offered me the snack!" Kaneki frowned, closing up his book.

"You chose well, it was delicious" Uta licked his lips over, "And I even got to try my favorite taste…"

"Which is…?"

"Your lips of course, Ken" the older ghoul muttered leaning forward and kissing the teen again. "Mmm, absolutely _yummy_ … I could just eat you up…" he smirked again, placing his head back on Kaneki's lap and closing his eyes. The white-haired boy hid his red face behind the novel again, not knowing what to think about it anymore.

"Your heart is beating so fast" the tattooed ghoul suddenly whispered again with a small snicker across his lips, "That's kinda cute…"

"Shut it!" Kaneki hissed and came back to the plot of his newest book…

…

The other moment which was particularly enjoyable for Kaneki was the time of falling asleep. The bed he shared with Uta was big enough for the two of them so they never crumpled. Ken would take his shower first, usually when Uta was still downstairs, in his studio.

During the certain night, already after a bath, the white-haired boy hopped under the duvet and made himself comfortable, breathing in the nice and unique scent which was all Uta's. His body relaxed, drowning in the peaceful slumber in waiting for the other ghoul to join him in a couple of minutes.

Soon enough, he heard the slow footsteps coming towards the room and shut his eyes tighter, pretending to have already fallen asleep. He should have known though that it wasn't that easy to mislead the mask-maker.

The tattooed ghoul came inside the room and closed the door behind himself, jumping into the bed and collapsing on the teen under the duvet.

"Uta-san!" The strangled exclaim came from under the blankets, "Y-you're heavy!"

"And you're a little _swindler_ , Kaneki-kun" the older murmured in Ken's ear, embracing the smaller figure of his lover and shifting so that they were clung to one another, "I won't let you fall asleep without a goodnight kiss…" he leaned in to the white-haired boy and brushed his lips against the other's delicately, weaving his hands in the white soft locks. Kaneki moaned into the kiss quickly giving up on any resistance because secretly he had been waiting for just this. "Have a good night sleep, Ken" Uta smiled lightly and wrapped his arm around Kaneki's waist, keeping him close to himself.

And it never failed to amaze the half-ghoul how affectionate and clingy his boyfriend at times might be.

…

The third thing Kaneki liked (probably even more than the previous ones) was the moment of waking up. He would always open his eyes first because Uta was such a sleepyhead and if he could, he would certainly spend the whole day in bed.

Watching the ghoul sleeping peacefully and being in his arms was something Kaneki loved cherishing. He wouldn't dare move so as not to wake his lover up for at least the first quarter. Then, after getting a little bored with lying still he would start with the simple caress of his hand the slow process of waking the other up.

His fingers slowly travelled through the dark hair and then along the jawline, stroking the smooth skin. As usually, it was much too less to wake Uta up, of course, but Ken was far from being done yet. He leaned closer so that their faces were just inches apart and braved himself to place a soft kiss on the other's lips. The tattooed ghoul twitched but his eyelids remained closed.

The white-haired boy barely managed to hold back a small chuckle, moving with his lips to Uta's cheek and starting to peck it innocently. "Wake up, Uta-san…" he whispered, placing his hand on the older's chest.

The mask-maker shifted in half-sleep and pulled the younger closer to himself with a soft grunt. This time Kaneki really giggled. In the moments like this Uta was anything _but_ intimidating or scary. He doubted if any of his friends could ever imagine the usually composed and cold ghoul being able to act so vulnerable and sweet.

"C'mon, I know you are not asleep anymore, Uta-san…— he murmured into the flesh of Uta's neck, inhaling strongly — …so open your eyes already, will you…?"

"Make me" the hoarse reply came.

"You have quite a lot of customers today" Kaneki said, feeling so good in the embrace of the other ghoul that he almost didn't want to leave the bed either… _Almost_.

"Try harder, Kaneki-kun" Uta mumbled, not convinced at all.

"I'll make you some coffee, Uta-san" Kaneki suggested, "Let's drink it together…"

"We might as well stay here. _Together_ " the older ghoul answered, opening one eye and glancing at the white-haired boy.

"I'll drag you out of the bed if I have to" the teen whispered, feeling the blush coloring his cheeks.

"Don't think you'd manage to" Uta smirked down at him, "Try better."

And Kaneki knew what he had to do because that was how it always worked. He exhaled heavily and grabbed Uta's neck, pulling him to himself and kissing deeply until he ran out of breath. He looked up at his lover in an urging manner, "How about now, Uta-san?"

"I might reconsider standing up… What about that coffee…?" Uta muttered, opening both eyes this time.

"The offer is still current" Kaneki smiled and sat up, "All you need is to get up, you lazybones..."

And that was pretty much how they would wake up everyday which usually took a half hour at least but might stretch out to even one and the half if Uta was in a foul mood...

…

Kaneki's relationship with Uta was usually peaceful mainly because the white-haired boy didn't ever want to make the older angry. Besides, the tattooed ghoul was calm and composed by nature and would become irritated or annoyed really rarely.

However, it seemed that there was one person who would unchangeably make his lover lose his composure.

It happened whenever Tsukiyama was coming to the shop. He somehow had managed to get to know about Kaneki's current location and would appear there at least once a week.

The day like this had happened recently and Kaneki still felt chills running down his spine when he would memorize that incident.

Tsukiyama, as always, rushed into the store, making so much noise as if the whole group came inside. He ignored Uta almost entirely, barely nodding at him and telling loudly that he hadn't come here for the services but to simply see Kaneki.

"Ah, dear Kaneki-kun… you smell so nice and delicious today…!" He quickly approached the teen, throwing off his orange jacket on the way and leaving it on a coat stand. The white-haired boy huddled on a couch, putting aside the novel and wondering how to react and gently turn him down. By the corner of his eye he managed to notice how Uta tensed up but as for now the tattooed ghoul stayed still by the desk, keeping on working on his newest order.

"Nice to see you too" he muttered, trying to be polite although he felt truly uneasy in the presence of this purple-haired man.

"Wouldn't you like to come with me for a cup of coffee today…?" Tsukiyama suggested with the wide smile across his lips and alarming spark in the eye. "There is a really nice café nearby. I am sure that we would _truly_ appreciate the _taste_ …" he licked his lips over and Kaneki got a feeling that he was talking about something completely different.

Suddenly Uta spoke, rescuing Ken from giving an answer, "I am sorry, Tsukiyama-san but Kaneki-kun is _busy_ today…"

"Oh, don't be so selfish, Uta-san" Tsukiyama muttered, turning his face for a second towards the tattooed ghoul, "Let the others at least _nibble_ our _delicious_ Kaneki-kun from time to time…"

"I am afraid that I must refuse…" Uta slowly stood up and turned around to the man with the studied indifferance on his face.

Tsukiyama made a disappointed expression, "But—"

"Kaneki's neither _ours_ nor to be devoured by _you_ " the tattooed ghoul interrupted him, "He's _all_ mine, _only_ _mine_ …" Uta stood in between the teen and the other ghoul, looking straight into Tsukiyama's eyes with a threat crawling in his own ones.

"What an egoistic person you are, Uta-san!" The purple-haired man exclaimed crossing his arms with the theatrical excessiveness on his chest. "Just a little bite and I'll let go…"

"Completely out of consideration" the tattooed ghoul said in monotone, barely preventing a growl. "I must ask you to leave now, Tsukiyama-san" he muttered, "The shop is about to be closed…" he almost pushed the ghoul out of the store.

"I'll come back and repeat the invitation, Kaneki-kun!" Tsukiyama managed to exclaim before the door closed behind him and Uta locked it up.

"Uta-san, you still have clients for today—"

"Not in at least two hours' time…" the tattooed ghoul whispered, coming quickly to the teen and taking him into his arms.

"Uta, what are you— Hey!" Kaneki goggled his eyes as the other brought him up and headed towards the stairs.

"You're mine, Ken. I am the only one who can devour you from your head to your toes…" the older ghoul snapped, kicking the door to the bedroom open and placing the white-haired boy on the mattress of the huge bed.

"But… It's the middle of the day!" Kaneki whimpered when Uta hovered above him.

"Does it matter what time it is…?" The other murmured softly, running his hand through Kaneki's white as snow locks and kissing him slowly, wrapping his arms around the younger ghoul.

 _No_ _…_ _it doesn't_ , Kaneki thought before he melted into the moment, letting Uta claim him and make him his… "Uta-san…!" He screamed weakly, feeling the other ghoul stripping him quickly.

"You have such a nice body, Ken…" Uta muttered, trailing his tongue up Kaneki's chest until he reached the level of the white-haired boy's neck. His fingers rubbed gently the place from which Kaneki's kagune was slowly coming out. This action made the half-ghoul arch his back and moan loudly as the pleasure ran through his veins. "You like it here, don't you…?" He asked quietly, throwing off his own clothes and revealing the tattooed torso. He let his own kagune grow out of his back and clasped it with Ken's, purring in pleasure when they made contact. The additional experience was provided by Kaneki's bucking hips and their erections rubbing together. Their bodies were touching in the most intimate way for both, humans and ghouls which was making the teen almost orgasmic there and then. "Kaneki-kun…" Uta murmured in his ear, wrapping his arms around Ken's waist, "Do you want me to enter you today…?" He asked for permission like always when they had sex, even though he would get the same reply every time.

"You know the answer… Uta-san…" the white-haired boy panted out, opening his human and ghoulish eyes, now shining with need and desire.

Uta crashed their lips together, reaching for a tube of lubricant from the nightstand and coating his fingers. "I always need to be sure that you're okay with it…" he muttered near Kaneki's lips, slowly pushing the index digit inside his lover.

"I'm always okay with it… if only it's with you" Kaneki whispered, feeling the second finger probing at his opening. He gasped when the needle of pain sank into his backside, "Uta-san…" he stammered out, "I want you to enter me _now_. Enough of this foreplay… I-I need you…" he blushed harder, looking up into Uta's ghoulish eyes.

"You sure…?" Uta joined their lips in a gentle kiss, making scissoring motions with his fingers. Kaneki nodded, not able to voice out any response. "Then focus on me now rather than on the pain…" the ghoul whispered, lining his lubricated member up Kaneki's entrance and kissing his lover hard while his hands were rubbing the red kagune and his hips made one accurate thrust. Their kiss muffled Kaneki's yelp.

Uta licked away the tears which came out of Ken's eyes, creating then a few hickeys on his collarbones and neck and waiting patiently for the other to give him a sign to start moving.

Kaneki wrapped his legs around the older ghoul and pulled him closer in a soundless permission and so Uta pulled out and then thrust in again and again until both of them were all covered in sweat and couldn't take this anymore…

.

.

.

Was it love…?

Kaneki wasn't sure but even if it was not, he was pretty much content with his life by Uta's side. And even if Uta didn't feel the same way, Kaneki knew that he had fallen completely for this ghoul the day he had started living with him and would never like to live in any other way…

* * *

 **Second Note: Any thoughts? Feel free to comment, that always makes me happy :3 Also, if you came across any UtaxKaneki fanfics beside those posted on this page, would you mind sending me a link? I would love to read about them a little more but ain't have enough time to look for such stories myself...**


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